The grad speech I should have given…

December 6, 2006

I’ve been digging through the archives here on my computer, and I stumbled upon a gem (in my personal opinion). It’s the preliminary graduation speech I wrote a year ago.

All I have to say is that I should have stuck with it. The one I ended up giving was bloated with cliches and narcissism.

For your perusal, here’s my first:

Let me start off by saying that I started this speech December 16th of this year, so any suckiness may be attributed to me, not to a lack of preparation or procrastination.

That out of the way, let me also say that I realize that on this day, you don’t want to hear me talk for 10 minutes. You probably don’t want me to talk for another sentence. This is your day, just as much as it’s mine, so I’ll try to keep this simple and sweet.

I’m not the smartest one out of this years graduating class. I’m not the most athletic, or the most talented. I don’t have the most friends, or know the most teachers. I don’t handle people the best, or know how to be a friend the best. To put it simply, I’m not the best of any of you. The best anything lies with you, and you can look forward to that. But somehow, by some fluke of luck, I ended up being the “valedictorian.” But, and I did not know this until this year, valedictorian’s Latin root just means, “to bid farewell.” So, really, I should be talking after Ed, but anyway, my point is that I’m not that important. On this day that leads to the future, I’m the least important factor, the thing you’ll remember the least.

And with that in mind, I’ll take this chance to say a little bit about a lot of things, knowing that you won’t remember it, but that I’ll be able to watch the video of this graduation and go, “Damn, I did good.” First, I’d like to take a page from my sisters book and say, we’re the next generation. Literally, we’re the start of the new, hi-tech, fancy smancy “millenials.” Not Gen Z.

But that doesn’t really matter. Just another label to add to the can. More importantly, I want to remind you that you can make a difference. In the end, that’s all that anyone can do, is make a difference. So, go out and make a difference.

Oh yeah, and thanks to my family, friends, and all the teachers that made these years bearable.

And because I said I’d say it: _________, I love your _______.


Yeah, have fun with that fill in the blank part at the end. :) If you guess it, I give you my goat.

PS – If you do guess the last part, keep in mind IT’S A JOKE. Thanks

2 Responses to “The grad speech I should have given…”

  1. Dave in the West said

    KENNY, I love your GIRLFRIEND

    hahaha… good times.
    Yeah, I think this speech would have been a kajillion times better. Either way, “everyone” would hate it because technically, they don’t want to listen to anything. But they don’t matter.

  2. ddarmon87 said

    I owe you a goat. :)

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